Grateful.

Its 2:17 P.M. and i'm taking a bit of time to reflect on what i'm so truly grateful for.

It's been a tumultuous few days for the family. My nephew's wife - beautiful, young and so in love, was killed on Wednesday morning on her way to work when her car spun out of control, crossed a median and was hit by a gravel truck. She was 19. Family has been pouring in from all over the country for her funeral. The viewing is actually happening today, she'll be buried tomorrow and the memorial service will be held on Sunday - what would have been they're first wedding anniversary. Truly heart-breaking.

Its hard to make sense of life sometimes; all the whys, what-ifs, and why nots, but all the questioning in the world will never bring her back and it breaks my heart; it also invariably makes me question my own circumstances - if I knew that today was my last day would I be happy with what I've done with not just today, but my life so-far?

Beg's consideration.

And so, i'm here, at my favorite starbucks drinking my favorite calorie laden drink listeing to the crooning of the album playing - it seems to be compilation of Dean Martin, Ella, Billie and others which are my favorites. I hugged both my parent today and told them I loved them, (they drove 1200 miles to be here and got in at 4 this morning); mom and I actually sat and had a (depressingly) frank conversation about age - how in 2046 she'll be 100, and I'll be older than she is now... it seems so far away, and yet so short a time. A proverb says 'man, born of woman is short lived and glutted with agitation' - so true but depressing. Motivates me to be less 'glutted with agitation' and determined to see life as the glass half full.

I found someone I want to know more and more about; the joys, sorrows, everything. I spent time with my niece, and will see my other niece tonight. I've seen and talked to cousins, brothers and other loved ones.

I think that at the end of the day, its about capturing the little everyday moments that are so fleetingly normal that build to make memories and a life worth living... those sometimes agonizing moments where we seem so bored with the monotony of life that really are the special times. I'm grateful to have had all of those moments, good and bad b/c they make me who I am today, who I want to be, what I'm not and what I inspire to be.

Bottom line, I don't want to waste one second of this precious life I've been granted, ever. It's all I have.