It's late, well for me anyways - 12:19 A.M...
I'm sitting on my couch listening to the furnace kick in - grateful for the sound as I swear my upstairs neighbors have been trying to save money and keeping it really low so it's generally freezing down here where I have noooo control... so I'm absolutly thrilled that I can't see my breath tonight as I sit sipping on licorice tea wrapped up in a blanket.
Oddly enough, today was good, now I say this only because generally i push myself so hard throughout the week that by the time Friday actually rolls around i'm so beat that i'm a disaster - not a pretty sight. Teary, grumpy, emotional cause well that's me over-tired. Lets throw in a guy calling reaaallly late on a fairly regular basis due to time zone differences who melts my bones and well, geez Fridays are generally terrible by the time they roll around.
So for a Friday the 13th, it went pretty well. I'm having a bit of difficulty keeping busy at work b/c we've slowed down so much but thankfully we're staying together as a team and pulling through together, so no worries there. If I had to change jobs right now it would be like leaving family - very fortunate to work with the people I do.
So, spent much of today randomly twittering - yes, i've become obsessed with it, and Must lay off it - i'm irritating myself, never mind all my tweets (sorry); did more research on diving, France & Belize and got asked out by my talent manager, who called to book me for a job. I just keep wondering to myself if this much attention has been happening all along & I just haven't seen it, or if it's new... either way i'm finding it strange and more than a little distracting as i'm so not ready for that yet... if at all. I've found out that 'bone-melting men' generally melt the brain as well, and i turn into a complete idiot - not so attractive or productive, but glad that I can feel again, even if it's hurt at this point.
Spent the evening with family which is wonderful, distracting and all around supportive given that exactly a year ago my life fell apart. So the lovey-dovey week of valentines has been a bitter pill, especially running into mutual friends who are now pregnant and happily married and living the life I dreampt of for so long... it's been rough.
My niece learned how to start a fire, and we snuggle up just to watch it; played video games with Curt, and just enjoyed the solace of the evening, letting it wash over me distracting me from my disquieting thoughts.
It was much needed and appreciated... it's in those moments which we find ourselves oppressed with over-abundant emotion that our grounding force, our families whether blood or eclectic help us center ourselves again and just let us breathe.
So tomorrow has arrived and I need to sleep at some point and now sounds just about right.
G'night.
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